Are these the two saddest guys in hip hop?
They both seem to have plenty of pain in their lives, enough for an album of wrist slitting at least. But who really has it worse?
1. "I've got 99 problems, and they all bitches."
"I've got one problem, and she's a spoiled, little LA girl."
Winner: Cudi. That's a lot of problems.
2. "I've got some issues that no one can see."
"I keep having these visions. And I also have a sports car."
Winner: Gotta give it to Kanye on this. Cudi's "issues" might be more imaginary than Drop Dead Fred. Kanye definitely has a sports car.
3. "I don't have nobody."
"I just can't seem to love you the way I want to."
Winner: Kanye again. What the hell?!? Just do it, Kanye. At least you got someone.
4. "Day and night, I toss and turn, and I keep stressin'."
"Bitches be heartless."
Winner: Hmm... this is a toss up. Neither of these things are really issues.
I would call both of these "issues" truths of life that Kanye and Cudi are exploiting musically worse than the Black Eyed Peas writing a song about how pregaming makes you really excited for how your night is going to turn out.
5. "I've got the heart of a lion."
"I'm amazing."
Winner: Toss up for both of these fruitcakes.
6. "Enter galactic you and me."
"I'm just not in the streets."
Winner: These motherfuckers are both in outer space right now. I don't even know.
Overall: Shoot, Kanye has the money. Kid Cudi slept in his mom's bed til he was 12 because of "night terrors," which are worse than nightmares according to him. And he talks about this like it's going to score him chicks, although he usually just gets really high and ignores the ladies anyway.
It does certainly seem to be raining shit on both of these superstars. At least Kanye is a little funnier about how he deals with it.
6 comments:
wow this is hilarious! i'm so glad i stumbled onto this page lol
Cudi is definitly the sad rapper. It wasn't too long ago that kanye was singing celebration and good life while cudi was locking himself in his room crying about his issues that nobody could see. Give it a month and kanye will be back to his award-show crashing self. Cudi will always be the kid who's scared of the dark. Tell me what you know about night terrors Dutch. Nothing.
Another happy customer. Yeah!
And as much as Cudi is definitely the sad rapper, something must be said for the extreme sadness that Kanye fell into after celebrating the good life.
Both of them are some bipolar motherfuckers though.
And it's true, I know nothing of night terrors. Because they're called really bad nightmares!
Has Kid Cudi even lost his virginity yet?
Does kanye know what alopecia is?
Now I get what Propecia means...
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