4 Rob

Getting lazy

Is this the worst movie ever made?

Coming this fall.....

A man with a dark past

A woman with no future

Each searching without seeing...

'

He writes self-help books, but can't follow his own directions.

She sells flowers, so I guess she's .... independent?

Favorite line:

"Where are we going, gurl?"

"Isn't it fun not knowing?"

Well, unlike you, I have responsibilities and commitments in the world, so I was wondering if this is going to be an all day thing.

Exclusive: towards the end, the two split apart, thinking they're not right for each other. Jen wants proof of love. And guess what Aaron does to win her back?

Next time you're faced with a situation like this, just write a letter to her.

Rob's Coming Back to this?

-you gotta love that the Raiders play on a half baseball field like a true
cheap ass team. Not to make any point, but if between the 49ers and
the raiders if one of them followed the SF Giants and bought a new
stadium these teams might be getting somewhere on more than just draft
busts and failed trades.

-espn: and how did Tim lincecum do tonight? Well show you after the break.

In the background a video of Tim lincecum blasting the dugout, throwing
a grenade, beating up people

-Rihanna: I swear I'm gonna wear no pants and just pull my jacket
bottom down if I have to do this track again.

Really? We don't even half to ask?

-wearing a thong, didn't have the body to go with it

-sometimes a joke is funnier if it isn't finished and slightly stumbled

-what's worse for a city: a casino or a sports team?

-wilson edible tennis balls

-the thing I like about borat is that if you are a good honest person,
you won't look like an idiot in the movie, it's like you're being
punked. But he will get you at your most honest.

-when someone says you look like doogie bowser, it's an insult. But
Fred flinstone...

-pot = crime to discovery channel
what about a bit about badass chopper pilots who fly over the weed fields and then swat team like drop in and take them out. Kind of like cops off the streets into the jungles- maybe go to Colombia too, really start some shit


maybe the main character started as a badass busting up weed fields
then he upgraded- hes a throwback to an old 80's hero, who knows how to shoot every gun and drive every vehicle
shoots a LOT

-bald dude the ball dude

-two opposite characters: guy who wants to stop being high/guy who can't get high but needs to

-lack of minorities on tv- it's a money thing more than a race thing. Just a lot of white people in the world.

-pothead mastermind

-I can't believe professional athletes and actors. When would I ever think of a time where I was going to turn someone down for an autograph?

-July you lie

-kanye west was retaliation for whitey interrupting Obama

-nattyisms





Just watch out for the Natty Fatties and the Natty Splatties.

Facebook humor

I used to live here.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/maryland/baltimore-city/bal-md.samurai16sep16,0,114199.story?page=1

You missed it all

They seized the Harbor House.

Patrick Swayze Passed Away

Time to drink a(nother) beer

57 years old. It's never enough.

Oh no, it's Kanye again.

Something to remember him by.

Kanye...

Kanye just grabbed the microphone out of Taylor Swift's hand at the VMA's because he thought beyonce should win the best video award.

It seemed like it was planned, but here's how it went down.

He was seen entering the awards show like this.

And then Obama got into it.

They think they might have to blame it on the alcohol.

Whoops Kanye.

Matrix Reloaded Review

The matrix reloaded might be the corniest movie ever, by using both the flashforward and the it was all a dream bit in the same moment in the opening scene

-first line to new agents - hiya fellas, then upgrades? Pointless fight, followed by here's something cool I can do now as he flies away

-oh baby let's make out the first moment were alone. Were so much in love

-there's no need for a fight on top of the truck in the matrix 2 if the agent just morphs into the truck driver to begin with. There's no point for neo to fight all those agent smiths if he's just going to fly away anyways

-dontya feel like George Lucas wrote the two matrix sequels as well?

-Zion is the dumbest place Ive ever seen. That's the best they can do? I saw Walle, how about at least a swimming pool? You got all the money, and if they blew up Zion 6 times before, there must be a few nice pieces of furniture at least. How about a cow for a little dairy?

-Zion is dumb, but ghost rider holy shit.

Ghost rider review

- maybe after I find out my dad has cancer, the devil will show up. But maybe the devil is sending these letters himself, tricking these fools into doing what he wants their kids to do

-dad, I feel like I'm a young Nicholas cage

-man, that devil went back on his word? Can't trust that devil.

-going to take dads bike on a death run wth no helmet down this gravel road. It's what he would have wanted.

-you can't punch the devil? Who came up with that rule?

-I'll meet up with you again when you're hotter and I'm older

-yeah, I always close my eyes too when I'm jumping about 18 trucks on a motorcycle.

-this one of them fancy beer bottles that gets cold when I touch it?

-sand fellow, wet watery guy, bob Marley looking guy travels on smoke: good to see you all

-I go for natural forms of adrenaline like drinking a pot of coffee

-lil Wayne's definition of what a gangsta is that they do what they want at All times. Nic cage is A gangsta.

-what's the most played out way to indicate someones going fast?

How about radar detector?

Too played out.

Blow the cop up?

Now were cracking

-Nic Cage turning into Ghost Rider the first time... Wow.

-when you've run out of ideas, use the flaming chain as a fake tornado to capture a bad guy like a ghostbuster.

The same chain we used to throw that helicopter that it flew off with?

-Just like the water transformer, the water devil can't hang out with the group unless they're at the beach or a walk along the river bank

-While Ghost Rider was underwater, he lit the water devil on fire

-Ghost Rider's other attack is to throw fire snow balls

-Ah! I got ghost in my mouth!

-Matrix and ghost rider on commercial. I will not watch top gun. That
might be my least favorite movie. What else is on?

King Arthur review

-everyone, instead of moving across the ice quickly and evenly ,
let's stop a lot.

-I don't want to watch this anymore. What a fucking lame movie.

-x men 3 is also on. That is all.

Top 6

1.) Dr. Dre
2.) Kanye West
3.) 2Pac
4.) DJ Quik
5.) Jay-Z
6.) OutKast

I think in terms of overall final product. These six seem the most concerned with making the best song possible.

The way I'd read this list is, if I heard that all these five artists released a new song today, this is the order I would care about those songs. And I'd probably listen to them in this order because of the overall quality of the song, from most disappointing to least.

Dr. Dre may not write his own lyrics, so it's kind of unfair to put him at the top, but I'd imagine that Dre treats lyrics like another instrument in the song, and his voice is a pretty good rap voice, and he can perform pretty well. His ability to put together all those elements is what makes him so good.

Also, Dr. Dre is number 1 because of the same reason Michael Jackson is innocent, "He made Chronic."

I prefer 2001 to OG, but 2001 means more to me.

Also, Dr. Dre wins because Chronic 2001 and, arguably, The Black Album, as the last hip hop albums that just about anyone could dig and play on repeat. I would like to enter Nas' Hip Hop is Dead and Busta Rhymes' The Big Bang as honorable mentions in this category. I don't think I can put any of Kanye's CD's in here, maybe the greatest hit's one that I made.

Kanye West is a new and improved Jay-Z, learning from Jay's mistakes and doing in 4 albums what it took Jay-Z 11 to do. Sure, Kanye might not be as smooth a lyricist as Jay, but he's making the debate turn into apples and oranges with his own styles, kind of the same way it's tough to compare different rock and r&B singers. Hiphop is great, but it is self-limiting. It's difficult to make a music expand when there's so money pushing it to stay the same, a similar problem with movies.

Even though Kanye's my dude, I don't know if any of his albums stand up all the way through. A couple songs are just way too out there. But when he's on, he's dead on to the point where it's all you want to listen to and just try to figure it out, like a puzzle, what's it about.

2Pac, I guess, means if he were still alive, that's how important I'd imagine his music would be. A first of his kind hip hop artist, maybe Too Short as well, with a tireless work ethic but also an amazing ability to sustain high quality product. Every 2Pac song that he was alive to make is pretty dope. Some of it is average, but nothing stands out as totally wrong, something that you can fault Lil Wayne and Kanye and Jay and Nas for daily. But I can only imagine how well 2Pac could have embraced modern hip hop, and not go down the roads of the Snoops, 50 Cents, Eminems, getting stuck in themselves and questioning their abilities.

DJ Quik gets a spot because of how much better he is than everyone else. He might make a similar song really well, but damn, every one of his songs pops through the speakers better than any other artist I've heard. The bass line are so crisp and potent. His snares are the fattest I've heard, blowing Dr. Dre's new fake handclaps out of the water.

He's also the best musician I've heard to learn musical theory from. For starters, keep the BPM's up. Something the rap, Timbaland, like to do is long drawn out beats. Quik's beats are all for stepping, walking around, moving, it's a genetic funk thing and Quik's got it- one of the few people who's definitely doing exactly what's he put on earth for.

Jay-Z makes the list because, when it's all said and done, he is going to have so many hits that it's impossible to say he wasn't the best. The same way that the Beatles and the Rolling Stones and Michael Jackson and Elvis are all the best, Jay-Z is right up there with them. It's what he's always wanted to do, and he is doing it. He can release Blueprint 3 because he knows he tried some shit, it worked all right, and then he'll do it again but better, or at least different, next year. Pretty impressive that he has released so many songs in such a short period of time, while doing all the business he handles as well.

And OutKast definitely means them together. Even Speakerboxxx/The Love Below I wouldn't really call outkast. I think Idlewild is probably more OutKast. I'm not so interested in their solo work, because, let's be honest, we've already heard it. It's good, and it made them a lot of money, but I don't want to hear Hey Ya anymore. Also, you can see that on Stankonia, they ran into a wall and had run out of good ideas. Funny that this happens when you put out your best single to date too, Ms. Jackson.

I think of what would have happened to Outkast if that had been their first CD.

But on Southern..., ATLiens, and Aquemini they were all about crazy songwriting. And that's what their new album together would bring. They are so in tune with how their music should sound and what they want to convey, that is why they will be timeless.



New List

Top 10 Mainstream Rap CD's - of last 10 years
1.) Chronic 2001
2.) The Black Album
3.) The Blueprint
4.) Late Registration
5.) The Big Bang
6.) Hip Hop Is Dead
7.) The Documentary
8.) Food & Liquor
9.) The B.Coming
10.) Be

Memphis Bleek

Try around the 3:00 mark.

The Memphis Bleek story teaches us, if nothing else, that Ice Cube did not fall the furthest from the gangsta tree into the money pit.

Edit 9/18: Sportscenter just clowned on Memphis Bleek.

Kanye's Greatest Hits Album

I was thinking how much better late registration would been with can't tell me nothing, Barry bonds, everything I am. Songs that sound similar to the late registration era kanye- put celebration, we major and bring me down on graduation where they belong with drunk and hot girls. If he can do that kind of an album, that's the kind of thing that could rival chronic 2001 more than detox ever could

Here's what I'm thinking.

I've put together what I figure, so far, off his solo albums, his best songs are. This list is skewed towards the best production he's done, as well as the fact that I prefer Kanye when he's a little more introspective and less full of braggadocio. Here's what I'm thinking.

Kanye West presents his Good Ass Job

A greatest hits album, from the fan who doesn't want to hear some songs anymore

1.) Good Morning

Best intro he's done. Every piece is so well thought out, from the killer Elton John sample to bringing in Hov at the end.

2.) We Don't Care

Best first song he's ever done. Such a slap in the face to everyone who says he isn't a rapper and such a funny invitation to listen to his style of music.

3.) Touch the Sky

The best biggest song he's done. Also probably the only single of his that I don't get tired of. Just Blaze is the king of these tracks. I really wish he would stop making songs like Live Your Life and All of the Above and come back to dope horn samples. Show Me What You Got really knocked him.

4.) Drive Slow Strings Remix

As much as I love the album version, the strings remix is out of control. I really wish he had put it on the album. From the chopped and screwed drums to putting on Paul Wall. I could do without the TI at the end of the remix though.

5.) My Way Home

It'd tough to break up that back to back combo from Late Registration. Also, because these have all had collaborations- might as well put them all together. A big part of what makes Kanye's tracks work so well is that he works well with others. They push him hard.

6.) Spaceship

Man, this record is so smooth. And get some more collabos out of the way. Glc kinda like a Memphis bleek. It amazes me that this was an added song on the album, and wasn't there originally. I try to imagine what College Dropout would have been like if it hadn't been leaked and he didn't go back and redo it.

7.) Can't Tell Me Nothing

I feel like it's a weird enough record, but still is a big song. Similar to Mr. Carter, faking a sample by tweaking some vocals. Still not sure what she's saying at the end of the bars though. This song is on the list because after I saw Kanye live perform it, I realized how BIG a song it is.

8.) Barry Bonds

I'd follow this with Bonds because now the record can come back down again. Also, these two were a great tandem on the Graduation album, much like Drive slow and My Way Home. Also, another great guest beat from Nottz- probably one of his best.

9.) Addiction

A nice little change of pace and sound. I think this song comes out of Kanye's best type of music, between being totally honest with yourself and bragging about everything. When he taps into that, the music is something else. Also, what a great sample, and probably the first time we got to hear the new Kanye- listen to the drums on this track. So clean.

10.) Bad News

Well, i think it will blend nice into the next song, in terms of telling a story. Tracks 1 through 3 are that intro, the rise of a hero, track 4-6 show him trying to stay grounded but then, pride before the fall, followed 7-9, the real consequences of the lifestyle. This was the first song on 808's that, when I listened to it the first time, I was really vibing with. Great drum sample.

11.) Roses

Really take it down. This song is just so well done- except for mentioning Amerie for no reason. Another one of Kanye's best produced tracks- might be my favorite of his.

12.) Everything I Am

It's basically that moment where you try to really fix everything, because you see how close you were to losing it all. And Kanye will never be as laid back as this beat.

13.) Streetlights

Kind of uplifting get you ready to go big again. Another of the few songs that I could really sign on with when I first listened to 808's. The problem, or the difficulty, with Kanye is that a lot of the music really has to take you over. It always catches your ear at first, but not necessarily in a good way.

14.) Slow Jamz

Probably the only other single I can still throw a bone too. It's got a weird yet interesting enough sound that it works. A really knockout r&B/hip hop groove. And the world's first experience of a Kanye West single. It was a beautiful piece of work. And Kanye's best rhyme: "Got a light-skinned friend look like michael Jackson, got a dark skinned friend look like Michael Jackson."

15.) Gone

This is Kanye's best last song. I don't think anyone else could attempt something this big and knock it out like Kanye did, from production to concept to guests. "and if they ever flip sides like Anakin" and the strings change and get dark. Unbelievable. Also, it shows that he didn't need the game to live the good life, so he leaves it all behind.

Bonus track: Getting out the Game

Kanye, you used to make songs like this.

Second Bonus Track for International Version: Haters

That's the kind song you make when you're at the hip hop retirement community using the karaoke machine. And that's what a bonus track should be. A look into the future.

And I think that Tracy Morgan should narrate Kanye West's life CD.

Random v

-driving through the worst part of town to get drugs; only problem is
what's the worst part of Annisquam

-big epic trying to get a reunion with a girl at a party/bar only to
have it be a booty call

-fat baby with a beer gut

- bacon cheeseburger

-boner locking you into a toilet: have to have different magazines to
cool you down

-deadliest snatch

-five o'clock shadow on my cock

-she's saving herself for us

-hands of balls of steel

-pullstart car

-blood weed

-dogs that act exactly like lazy people

-making a bet on how a person dies then calling it out at the funeral

-Brett Favre goes by way f Roger Clemens and plays only home games,
but stays late at practice, who's grandpa on the football field

-where do you hide a liberator?

- kicking a cat across the room and the other guy grabbing it

-dog dragging a pillow so he can be comfortable when he lies down

-cash for clunkers but with sisters

-mocking a kid crying and wailing by doing the same thing

-fat girls have to dress slutty to show off their two assets

-lobstafari

-not enough dudes hold hands.

-you can google me : fighting words

-safety is my middle name

-that's what they used to call me in high school

-he's like the Black Lebrun James

-he loooooves cheezits

-extreme movie, sex pot, sunshine cleaning, sugar, half Nelson, brick,
bothers bloom, stripper academy, special, miss march, my best friends
girl, kicking the dog, cougar club, going down under, balls out,
bottle shock, adventureland,

-nights in white satin, poets of rhythm- more mess on my thing, good
vibrations, America by yes, closer, revelry by kings of Leon

-professional wii players- wiiners

-the terminator being sent back in time to make John connor a pothead
so he doesn't start a revolution and gets lazy instead

-guy who travels to foreign countries in the summer so he doesn't have
to watch just baseball

-sportscenter cones up with little mini stories for ball games

-dr dre wants to create a new file format for music

-the wnba desk at espn must be the worst place to work : hell inside
heaven jobs

-outsourcing for Jews

-herpatits pv

-jack daniels : the matchmaker.

-rectifying my mistake- wrecktifying

-deadliest couch

-saw for fat people: food network show where food is overcooked or
thrown away

-skoal sports drink

-.zz./x. Q

-hung: grumpiest old man ever

-rap music s the only music where you can talk about metaphors and
then explain them abs you can make whole songs about how good you are
at eveything. Also. You can kill other rappers if you don't like them
or want to make more money.

-football: the only sport where the better you do the less you have to
play. Don't want to play defense any more; get an interception and the
possessions over.

-a guy on MTV got caught smoking weed because he ate it all and had
some left on his teeth and lips

-conan and Andy got to the amine studio


-there's a distance from where decapitations are allowed on tv

- why do they always throw their swords? It was working Justine
earlier. And the shield too? Don't do that.

-anti cholesterol pills commercial followed by double cheeseburger
commercial

-tv of the future not far off with all sorts of logos around it

- top of iPhone headphone spot great place to point a joint on hold;
also looks like a funny antenna

Jay-Z Concert Review

-this is what happens when you have 1 good song on an album; empire
state of mind is already played out

-I'm guessing people probably don't know the next song, where I'm
from, nice pick jay.

- and they definitely don't like any blueprint 3. When jayz asks if he
can get into some bp3, I thinking the cheering meant no.

-jay z could have a hunchback from wearing too many chains from back
in the day. He had to switch to one small one. If you had as much
money as him, why not spring for the 50 milli necklace, maybe have
sabretooth tiger teeth hooked up around your neck, And a wooly mammoth
tusk as a pimp cane/crutch

-and kid cudi Cannot stand up straight up either. His pants too tight

-white Boys in the crowd don't do soul claps and sing things like
"ain't no love in the heart"

-like most things in life, one problem with the concert is too much
memphis bleek

-and when your concert needs to really kill autotune, you bring John
Mayer on the guitar and kenny g on the sax

-I think I just heard the cameraman yell at John to look towards him

-jayz not saying all his words, he just said resiliency like he was
daffy duck

-oh hey rihanna, care to sing us a song while you're here at the
concert?

Yeah sure just as long as it's not that bullshit run this town.

That's uh, the song actually.

Shit, all right, well how about as long as I don't have to wear pants.

It's funny you mention that, we were wondering if...

Artistic integrity

-I'm betting jayz was lying down on a bed during this three song kanye
bit with run this town, can't tell me nothing, good life- might as
well do touch the sky and get Lupe there too. But lupes never there
for touch the sky.

-I like how as soon as kanye started good life the backdrop lit up
with a huge theatre sign

-uh oh, he starting with the acapella "i, I go for mine! I got to
shine!"

-so you play a song where you say you don't have bitch problems and
they you shorty get it in, daddy go hard. No one want to hear that
jigga.

-and then top it off with beyonce singing diva- jigga, a bitch might
be one of your problems. "a diva is female version of a hustler." I
think jayz probably went off stage and got a hummer during this part.

-it's too bad that show me what you got didn't catch on and just blaze
now has to make songs like live your life and all of the above- really
waxl rihanna and tpain songs. These songs like Psa and this and roc
boys sound so nice live. Jayz has to put out another MTV unplugged soon.

-pharrell, let's do some old stuff.

Like some gangsta shit?

No like the only good song we made together.

Oh..... I'm a hustla baby! Give it to me!

-I like how jayz points at someone in the crowd, the cameraman points
to some fat white chick with a boyfriend, when really, jayzs probably
pointing to the hot dog girl- give it to me! Give that ketchup that
mustard that sweet that nasty and some kraut

-I think it's great that this sunglasses at night thing caught on so
well- rappers love it

-important things to you missing in America: historic first (and last)
time performance between swizz beatz and jay z doing his hit single,
on to the next one. Swizz beatz ....

-I've heard of a new trend of people doing songs so that other artists
never do them- I think this blueprint 3 is filled with death of....
Tracks.

Onto the next one and haters are death of a milli style tracks;

Forever young is definitely the death of 80s sample tracks

Off that is the death of fake rap techno future tracks

Empire state of mind is the death of jayz doing good songs

-I still don't understand why it says neptunes you two are
muthafucking greatest right before a timbaland song. Jayz loves
fucking with his producers, giving them shine and then dumping them
and then bringing them back like nothing happened.

-all I know is that jayz must really love the neptunes, or owe them
something, or they have something good they know about him

-Mary j blige, always good to stop by a party a little bit.

Oh hey Mary; should have figured you'd be here. We did this song in 96.

Well, I wasn't doing anything, heard that you were partying.

Does anyone even know this song?

Oh and can I play my next single? It's really wack. It's all I got.

No problem, I'll just take a nap. Do two songs.

(halfway through song one)

Jay, I'm done. This shits exhausting.

-jay z's offering to take it to overtime.

When do we get to say no?

When he stops asking.

-jayz plays his greatest hits- if they could blend these together a
little bit better

-a guy dresses up in a sailor hat and bowtie and then gets embarassed
when jayz notices him

-Memphis bleeks biggest claim is that jayz said he always smokes that
lA la la

-also that as long as jayzs alive memphis bleek is a millionaire- not
a bad deal

Favorite rap lyrics

"Say im not hot
Then your prolly on water
They prolly on water, they prolly on water
Prolly on water, They all on water"
- Wale

"96, 97, 98, 99, 2000, 2001 and beyond,
02, 03, 04, 05, 06 and 7, 08, 09"
- Jay-Z

"Never let me slip, cause if I slip, then I'm slippin"
-Dr. Dre

"We blasting off like lasers, nigga.
Pew Pew Pew."
-Kanye West

Newest Random Ever

If you describe a bj by saying "it sucked" does that mean it was good or bad?

Running of the pigs, cop party.

Tshirt with 'chillaxin' on the front

Sam daydreaming about throwing lobster off bridge, gets beat to it and framed.

Racist pianos. Why are there only 5 black keys?

"hey man, need a light?"
"no, thanks... I've got my own."

Timeshare in Disneyland. Pretty sweet piece of property.

Rich kids eating brie like it's hot. They love that shit.

Smoking resin.

Sleep punching someone in the back of the head.

Kid who likes chamillionaire remix of wu tang, but not wu tang.

Rob alright! Cop not alright.

Stoner spy, forgets plans.

When Spanish people say peninsula it sounds like penisula.

Good guys finish last, meaning, she came first.

Girl wearing jerk shirt.

Drunk again... Another good day at work! The Rob Bent Story

Baby sitters= drug dealers

Rolling by a cop, turning down f the police, he's playing the same thing.

Jesus seeing his shadow.

Pot is to anti-depressants; as orgasms are to extasy

Cereal is like people dog food.

Girl calling me a fag for ordering a mount gay. Is she right?

Live today, cause tomorrow man you never know.

Standing on top of a train with a skateboard. Putting it down and standing on it as train slows to gain momentum.

Pimps putting pricetags on their hoes.

Ghostbusters handles the appocalypse very believably.

Vibrator app for iphone.

Invisible condom. Best or worst invention idea ever?

Bathroom farts between guys.

A tranny kissed my cheek tonight. It was a rough night.
"cock in the henhouse!"

"well he can't be a starving artist, we fed him last night. At most, he's a hungry artist."

Good prank. Flying a remote control airplane into someones room while they're sleeping.

Tanning a 6 pack onto your stomach with well placed lotion.

Firecrotch whose pussy glows like e.t's chest when she's horny.

Girls dig lazy guys.

Winning large amounts of cash through fishing tournaments.

Girl who is too drunk for pants.

Borno's blackout abilities; reciting every word of the little mermaid,

Petnames girls hate; whiskey mouth, chapped lips, tiny vaginy.

True test of ones lonliness; google search results for "breeds of dog that love peanut butter".

Houston, we have a drinking problem.

I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.

I hate you, but I'm not in hate with you.

Why does twittering sound strangely sexual?