Lazy Afternoon

-The new Die Hard movie should've been called "Old Habits: Die Hard"- Idea blatantly stolen from the mind of Hannah French

-If you fuck a MILF, does she become a MIF?

-"I remember the day I learned I was an average student, I was fucking my spanish teacher and she kept yelling, "C!, C!"

-There should be a liscense test for drunk driving. If you pass the course you can have a couple extra hundreths on a breathalizer.

-"Hey, you know why I don't have a girlfriend? Fuckin' global warming, man."

-False Descriptions of a first car; Power steering= It takes power to turn it. 4-60 AC=put the windows down and go 60, Voice activated radio aka kareoke style = sing it yourself.

-It really paints quite the picture when a co-worker informs you, with a straight face, that his girlfriend used to be hot before she gained 100 pounds, you know, back when she was like 180ish.

-I would like to see more sarcasm in sign language.

-The AYC's new equalizer for bay series; top 3 winners gets free drinks at the bar, the season winner gets a free trip to rehab and their own Intervention episode.

Dark Knight Review

First, let's get all the spoilers out of the way. My favorite parts were all the sceens with batman, the joker, and then when batmans girlfriend becomes batgirl, and then with they have a kid and he becomes robin, because none of this was in the previews and I didnt think they would go that far. but it works. A+++

Random 2

-Kevorkian church- new members every sunday

-Driving across country to jump off the golden gate bridge and picking up hitchhikers all along the way writing multiple suicide notes depending on your fate

-Gunshots for a ringtone- arabic war cries

-How to be a better brother- book by vanilla ice

-Putting smaller ice cubes within the ice tray slots to make the water freeze faster

-Dressing up like a pilot to get through airports faster

-Newspaper- the daily weekly

-V day is extra special for people who got their cherries popped as a valentine

-Die hard with your v card

-Bars using funnels to finish drinks after last call

-True sign of bachelorhood: urinal in your bathroom at home

-Mc Hammer's next song - "whatever you Kids are down with, count me in too"

-Ghetto by fabulous is so good because of the woman singing ghetto. Its like

-Book title/ what are we smoking today god

-Shooting splatties on fatties

-Fuck of a bitch!

-Best of all time ever

-Ernest loses his virginity

-Throwback headphones

-Shaq oneal of county cork ireland

-Looking to like someone

-Huzzah

-Bangin season

-Movie preview: character says what then they show the title then he says when and they show the date

-Listen with your eyes

-Six degrees remix- original samples and new samples must share a word in the credits of each

-BJ: tastes best in your mouth

-No matter who you root for in sports, the bandwagon team will always be your opponent at college.

-Buddy cops vs. Buddy villains
Hugh jackman/gene hackman vs. Keith David/David keith

-Homeless man with air mattress

-Spider bites radioactive man and gets the power of speech and free will.

-There's nothing lamer than having a holster for anything other than a gun- ticket puncher on a train, mace, etc.

-pet books

-Eliasmallette.com

-Brockholiday.com

-Whiskey flavored binaca

-Gmush light

-21st birthday present: invite to rehab