-Cincinatti Bengals getting bought out by Bengay, change mascot to a hemroid
-Judging girls by candy bar sizes; fun size, king size, tear n' share.
- Learning about taste buds in class, stoned kids in the back misunderstand and think lesson is about tasty buds.
-Seeing eye monkey who helps you tell if a girl is hot or not.
-Calling a blind guy greedy for having a hot wife
-Describing a girl as " do it with the lights on good"
-Annisquam: High in High Society
-Become a proffesional arguer and just argue with people until they pay you for no reason.
-Bringing a portable grill to class and grilling up some burgers in the back.
-Puerto Rican guy who bumps techno so loud you can hear him coming for miles, when he finally gets out of car, pulls out an i-phone with attached subwoofer and continues to pump gasolina by daddy yankee
-Telling a cop on a horse that you're allergic in order to avoid a ticket.
-Ways to get famous;
-Get shot
-Straight up Piracy
-Saving people from fires, possibly setting fires first.
- moving into meerkat manor.
-Answers heard at north shore community college to the question of what country you would hit if you drove south from the u.s. : Cuba, South America, Central America.
-Songs that fat joe should have wrote, instead of lean back; sit down. 'bitch make me a sandwich', jump up, jump up, and then nap.
-Your gene pool needs chlorine
-falling asleep in class then waking up in the next, getting credit for both.
-gay guy who falls in love with his proctologist
-calling up recorded audio services and choosing the spanish option as a cheap alternative to spanish lessons
-Asking a guy in a slayer shirt if he's heard the new kanye.
-Optimus Prime singing 'ayo technology"
-Launch driver with missing 'a' on his jacket meets an actual lunch driver who drops off peoples lunches
-Kids waiting for a class to start on the first day finally realize class is a scam when they see the teachers name is Rusty Giblits.
-Teacher who pretends to be student on the first day of class to see how long kids will wait before leaving, possibly encourages rest of class to leave to avoid work.
-Signing up for pyschology classes to meet crazy girls.
-Old Lady teaching computer classes at community college on type writer. Was around for the first computer, still uses it. Thinks technology is work of the devil and advises students to avoid them for fear of possesion. Scared of how quickly computer works. Takes lots of naps. bakes cookies, but then yells at kids if they try and eat them. Gives lectures about how easier things are now a days. uses words like 'pianist' without laughing. bitter that computers can do everything she had to learn to do herself, tries to race computer with math skills, loses.
-Waiting outside pre-med classes to impress girls then leaving before class starts.
-Signing up funny names in class just to hear them called during morning list off, maybe using celebrity names. also keeps down class numbers.
- Homeless guy with high hopes, his sign reads " Will work for above average wage, warm bed, health plan and options for early retirement"
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