-If I were president, all shits would be blumpkins.
-Toilet on the side of the road, sign on it reads, "Out of order". no shit, literally.
-Text message break up is too long, just sent " check your email" instead
-Pranet Earf...i hate that shit. all those gay ass bees, sucking on stemen.
-Obama ski tricks= the blackflip
-Call me sometime! We'll text!
-Buying drugs in McDonald's Drive thru. Supersize that 8th.
-Anyone ever tell you that you have a hot vagina? Well you're welcome.
-Tattoos made with resin. keeps you perma-stoned.
-More necessary on demand features; beer on demand, strippers on demand.
-Think the scarecrow in the wizard of oz was really just trying to get some booty? telling dorothy all he wants is some brain. I dont think she got it.
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